To Those Who Wonder Why God Does Not Intervene in The Affairs of Men More Often

A U.S. Marine was attending a college course between missions in Iraq and Afghanistan. The professor, an avowed atheist, shocked the class one day when he walked in, looked toward the ceiling, and said loudly, "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15 minutes." The lecture room fell silent and the professor began his lecture. Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, "Here I am God - stillwaiting." It got down to the last minute when the Marine stood up, walked toward the professor and threw his best punch, knocking him off the platform and out cold. The Marine went back to his seat and sat down. The professor came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the Marine and asked, "What is the matter with you? Why did you do that?"The Marine calmly replied, "God is busy today protecting America's soldiers who are protecting your right to behave like an idiot. So He sent me."

Apparently Marines are taught
1) Keep your priorities in order, and
2) Know when to act without hesitation

I often wish I had such characteristics, but since I don't, I'll continue to bumble and 'milquetoast' my way through life the best I can.

This Goes Out to A Friend Who Is Having a Hard Time Believing

Nine year old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned at Sunday school."Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. Then he used his walkie-talkie to radio headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved.""Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked."Well, no. But if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd never believe it!"

Preach it Brother Bono!

They may not be at the front of the line for U2 concert tickets, but a crowd of mostly evangelical pastors was wowed by the band's frontman and all around do-gooder, Bono. Just as he had won over former U.S. Sen. Jesse Helms, Bono earned the admiration of 350 Triangle pastors Friday during a teleconference beamed in to Hope Community Church in Raleigh, N.C.

The rock musician struck a chord, declaring that no one can enter God's kingdom if they do not serve the poor. "The main thrust of the Scriptures is to meet Christ in working with the poor," he said.

Bono was interviewed by megachurch pastor Bill Hybels in a Dublin hotel near the singer's home earlier this year. In the interview, he spoke of a trip he made to Ethiopia in 1985 that opened his eyes to hunger and poverty, and eventually to AIDS. It was a passionate talk by the rock-star-turned-humanitarian, who has championed causes such as poverty, AIDS and debt relief to struggling nations.

"Christ won't let you walk away because it's difficult, expensive and a moral hazard," Bono said, speaking of the AIDS epidemic.

Bono's activism on the world stage earned him the honor of Time magazine's Person of the Year last year. But the source of his activism lies with his faith. Bono quoted Scripture liberally such as the passage in the fourth chapter of Luke's Gospel where Jesus preached of freeing the oppressed and reaching out to the poor. Then he counseled church leaders to think strategically. "What's in the way of getting things done?" he asked pastors to consider, adding later, "The world is more malleable than you think. You can wrestle it from fools."


by Yonat ShimronMcClatchy Newspapers

Evangelical Essentials, a "quadrilateral of priorities"

As a sympathizer and quiet proponent of the Emergent Church I wonder if I fool myself and others by claiming to be an evangelical believer. Frankly, on my most difficult days I wonder if I am any kind of believer at all. I certainly can't claim to be a shining paragon of Christian virtue and spiritual formation. I have almost as many questions as I do answers and when my darkened mind contemplates the world and its accumulating suffering I am sometimes tempted to doubt the 'good news'. Perhaps some of you who are more ebullient in faith would be so kind as to pray for this weak, straying (?) hypocrite.

Recently I came across two lists of Evangelical Essentials and I was relieved to discover that I am essentially still an Evangelical. If agreeing to the essentials are sufficient grounds to maintain membership in the fraternity, than I am in and no court of high evangelical doctrine can take my membership away.

It appears that doubting is not a deal breaker after all, even if it is a heart breaker.

Of the two lists I prefer the first (older) version of the essentials because it places Activism (making the gospel concrete) higher in the list and because it describes an Evangelical's relationship to the Bible in, shall we say, more flexible terms (the inerrancy and or infallibility question is one I can get tripped up on if pressed too hard by the fundamentally inclined.).

Art work supplied by Daves Designs. Check out his blog.
It is listed in my links to the left of the page.


Why don't you take the faith challenge and see if you qualify as an Evangelical believer.

Four elements :
In seeking the essentials of belief, generally all roads today lead back to a historian at the University of Stirling in Scotland. In Evangelicalism in Modern Britain, David Bebbington framed four characteristics which he says are "the special marks" of Evangelical religion and which many others use as a basis for a common understanding.

• The "quadrilateral of priorities" is:

• Conversionism, a belief that lives need to be changed;
• Activism, the expression of the Gospel in deed;
• Biblicism, a particular regard for the Bible;
• Crucicentrism, an emphasis on the sacrifice of Christ on the cross.

In their introduction to Evangelicalism, editors Bebbington, Rawlyk and Mark Noll, McManis Professor of Christian Thought, Wheaton College, reworded the categories as:

• A stress on the New Birth;
• A reliance on the Bible as ultimate authority;
• A focus on Christ's redeeming work as the heart of essential Christianity;
• An energetic, individualistic approach to religious duties and social involvement

How do you rate on the Evangelical "quadrilateral of priorities"?

Are you all in, all out or a little of this and a little of that?

Tag. You're It!??!?

Someone tagged me in an earlier post.
I wasn't sure what that meant.
At first I thought,
'Oh no not another computer cookie thingy'.
Since then I have discovered that being tagged
is a cyberspace game of old fashioned tag
with an intellectual twist.
Being tagged means someone wants me
to participate in the Book Meme game.
This game consists of answering 10 questions
about books that we have read
and then tagging someone else to do the same.

It looks like fun so here I go.



1. One book that changed your life (other than the Bible).

Changed my life? Now hey, that's a pretty big claim for any book (other than sacred scripture) to make.

But perhaps I will say that one book provided a line that I have kept deep in my third belly and brought forth from time to time to chew over in my mental cud.

It came from J.D. Salinger's lesser novel, Franny and Zooey. The line is delivered at the end of the book and it proves to be the miracle cure for Franny's tormented mind. It goes something like this.

"Jesus is the fat lady sitting on her back stoop, shooing flies from her face as she swelters in the heat, dying of cancer."

That has been powerful food for thought over the years. It tasted real funny the first time I tried to swallow it but it becomes sweeter and more satisfying with each new chew.

2. One book you've read more than once.

The Eaton's Christmas Catalogue. It was this young boy's vision of toy heaven.



3. One book you would want on a desert island.

The Eaton's Christmas Catalogue. After Christmas it served as almost adequate toilet paper and was a good fire starting material.

4. One book that made you laugh.

I don't think I read or laugh enough. Perhaps I should start doing both tomorrow.

5. One book that made you cry.

The Happy Prince by Oscar Wilde.
When God sent his angel to bring back the 2 most precious things in the city, the angel gathers up from the dust heap the broken lead heart of the Happy Prince and the body of the dead swallow who had loved him and served the suffering people of the city.

"You have rightly chosen," said God, "for in my garden of Paradise this little bird shall sing for evermore, and in my city of gold the Happy Prince shall praise me."

How I long for God to proclaim that over my broken lead heart.

6. One book that you wish had been written.


The best seller that made me rich.




7. One book you wish had never been written.


The Naked Ape. Desmond Morton. It makes this impossibleape blush under his fur just thinking about it.

8. One book you are currently reading.

Confessions. St. Augustine.

9. One book you have been meaning to read.

J.D. Salinger's greatest work. Catcher in the Rye. If Franny and Zooey can tell me so much about Jesus in one line I am expecting a real doozy in this one.

10. Five people I tag to do this meme:

Any volunteers?
How about
Steve of Grow Mercy
Professor Jeff McNair of Disabled Christianity
Professor Earl (aka James) Breech of Jesus and Interpretation
Antoinnette of L'Arche London
Walter and Brenda of Duncartin' Farms?


PS


I've got to add one more category



Two Books (other than sacred scriptures) that would change the world if everyone on earth would read them.

The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky

and

Man's Search For Meaning by Victor Frankel

The Great Carnac says the answers are.......

2 c 3 d 5 a 6 b 7 d 8 c 9 b 10 c 11 a 13 b 14 c 15 a 16 d 20 d







Ed Mcmahon: Ho HO HO Ho Ho ho ho ho ho ho .......oh?

Mel and the Gang

Please note, in case someone is tempted to think that I place Mel Gibson in the camp of the Charlatans, I do not. I would trade one Mel for almost all the evangelists on American television.

I have followed up my Mel series with a few jabs at Peter Popoff, Robert Tilton and Jim Whittington because unlike Mel, they never admit their faults, never confess their shortcomings, never tell the unvarnished truth and apparently never give a damn what widow, orphan, cripple, challenged and poor person they steal from.

Mel may be a loud mouthed obnoxious drunk, a maker of extremely violent entertainment, an ego maniac, a conflicted son of a holocaust denier and an Olde School Catholic but for all that I think he is a guy doing the best he can in the life he has and he is honestly confronting his demons (but sometimes losing).

Mel is a modern day version of the Apostle Peter. He's brash, intemperate, loveable and genuine.

If you must crucufy him, do it upside down please, I think he would prefer it that way.

Oh yeah I almost forgot, for humanitarian reasons please offer him a few sops of wine to ease the pain but make sure he is nailed down good and tight before you do. You know what trouble he gets into when he's been drinking.

LH

Share Some of Your Favourite Charlatan Sheenanigans

Peter 'Poop' off and Robber 'Telt' on certainly do push the envelop but I always got a special kick out of charming Jim Whittington's solution to his viewers' money woes.

Now don't miss a step. It's all important in God's economy, don't ya know?

Here we go.................

Prayerfully wrap a dime in a twenty dollar bill.

Send the wrapped dime to dear brother Jim.

Miracle working Jim anoints the dime with holy oil from holyland vineyards (in Scottsdale Arizona) .

Then big hearted Jim sends you back your dime (provided you include a self addressed stamped envelop.)



Poof magico, someone's money woes have been solved. Certain unbelievers think that perhaps it is dear Brother Jimmy's pecuniary problems that are being addressed?

Don't you just love dear Brother Whittington?

The shouting, sweating preacher also likes to wear more gold jewelry on his person than Mr. T. did in his Hollywood hayday*. Jimmy W. says that since he is going to walk streets of Gold in heaven he might as well get used to lots of it down here.

Don't you just love dear Brother Whittington?

I sincerely hope he gets to experience his eternal reward real soon.

But may hefirst do a Zacchaeus and repent and restore four fold before he gets what is really coming to him.

*Mr. T. has given up the gold chains because he has come to understand that in a world of poverty it is poor symbolism for Christians to live so ostentatiously. God Pity the Fool who questions Mr. T.'s motives on this. I for one applaud the big guy.

What a Pity 'Peter Poop off' And 'Robber Telt on' Weren't Around to Put a Stop to This

How sad that these great Christian Teachers weren't around to instruct the Apostles. Perhaps every Thomas, Matthew and Thadeus of them could have ended their days counting their denarii in marble mansions over looking the eternal city of Rome instead of on crosses, on bloodied, brain spattered rock piles, on executioner's blocks and flaying tables.
If only, if only ..........Sigh.





NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!! a thousand times NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If Peter P. and Bobby T. had been there something wonderful would have happened. The first time a Roman court told them 'disown Jesus or die'' they would have quietly recanted , sung the praises of the divine Emperor, gone back to selling used chariots and left the job of proclaiming the Lord's Life, Death and Resurrection to men and women of integrity.

If only, If only......Sigh, for real.

Possible New Mel Gibson Productions

After Mel's smashing success with The Passion of the Christ I expected to see a sequel. Perhaps The Passions of the Early Christians. Such a theme would give Mel all the scenes of cruel, but true to life suffering that he would need to create a movie in the line of Braveheart and The Passion........The Passions of Bravehearts?........ That picture could have been an effective antidote to the 'faith of magic' preached by some prosperous Television Evangelists who are exploiting people with claims of easy faith and plentiful miracles. If God makes everthing 'nicey-nice' then someone forgot to let the martyrs in on the secret faith formula that never fails.

If Mel took on this project perhaps he could find some modern prosperity preacher 'look-a-likes' to film in the coliseum of Rome as they are torn to pieces by wild animals, slaughtered by gladiators, used as torches to light Nero's dinner parties and tortured in sundry other nasty ways. Perhaps a Robert Tilton, and a Peter Popoff double could do a whining duet while they are crucified on either side of the Apostle Peter. Peter would be shown bravely insisting that he be crucified upside down because he felt unworthy to die in like manner as his Lord. The evangelist 'look-a-likes' would alternate between praying for miracles of deliverance for themselves, and calling down fire from heaven for their persecutors. Their histrionics would be interspersed with offers to bribe their way off the crosses with denairi they had collected from fearful Christians.
In flashback sequences, Old Tyme Robert T. and Ancient One Peter P. could be portrayed preaching to a crowd saying things like; 'Martyrdom is for ignorant chumps because we've got the power'. "Yeah I say unto you that your faithfulness in supplying my needs will guarantee you the protection of the 93rd Psalm, 'And though a thousand may fall at your left hand and ten thousand at your right, none of the nastiness will come nigh thy dwelling.' Its in the Bible people.' So prove your faith by making a large donation to the Popoff and Tilton ministries so we can personally pray to activate the magical powers of faith on your behalf. The scene concludes with a collection. 'Now brother Claudius please pass the offering barrel as we sing 'We're King's Kids Rolling in Kingdom Clover'."

The irony would be sweet. The movie even might get an AA rating because of the social significance of its message.

Mel, you could have given us Passion II /The Passion of The Bravehearts. But some devilish temptation steered you into a cul de sac. Sadly, the true story of the Passion of the Early Church will not soon be giving a counterpoint to some of the questionable practices and teachings of evangelists speaking in the name of religion over our soiled airways.

More's the Pity.


Does anyone else have another suggested script for Mel's next outing? Leave me a comment to get the creative juice flowing.

LH

What in the World Was Mel Thinking?

Mel might be some kind of a genius and at the same time he could be a bit of an everyman over-achiever. He probably has risen to a level of success that is not sustainable for any ordinary person.

After the struggle to birth The Passion and the subsequent success of his personal mystical mission, Mel appears to have succumbed to the temptation to fly too close to the sun.

Hubris is a nasty thing. [James 1:14 Contemporary English Version (CEV)
We are tempted by our own desires that drag us off and trap us.]

Mel's new movie, Apocalypto, was to be ready for a summer release but was postponed till Dec. and is probably going to get another rescheduling as Mel dries out and the studios ask themselves, once again........

What in the World Were We and Mel Thinking?

Apparently Disney gave Mel Gibson creative freedom to choose any story and tell it in anyway he liked. After all it worked marvelously with the Passion. Over confidence may have caused Disney and Mel to try to construct a Bridge (between faith and reality that was just ) Too Far. I mean really, what studio executive would green light such an arcane project with no obvious commercial draw unless he thought Mel could work a miracle?

I am waiting with baited breath to see if a redemption of this hairy infant monstrosity is possible(Of course I am refering to the new movie, not Mel, in case anyone is wondering who the hairy baby monstrosity is). I confess that I highly doubt Mel can do this miracle.

Even if the film turns out to be the second coming of WaterWorld I can hardly wait to discover what themes will be woven into the excruciating violence and the transcendentally beautiful natural scenery of the production.

Perhaps Mel will try to make parallels to our modern fascination with 'end times'. Perhaps Apocalypto will be a warning about not taking prophecy seriously enough or maybe he thinks we are over playing this type of thinking and theologizing.

Who knows, Mel might take an entirely different tac and have Al Gore read over the credits a lesson on how the Mayans degraded their environment and caused their own destruction. Or perhaps Michael Moore will tell us that a Mayan quest for an overreaching hegemony was a precursor to their fall, as it may be for America.

Perhaps Mel discovered that the Mayan Calendar declares 2012 is the End of the world as we know it. And perhaps, just perhaps he has decided to let us all evangelistically enjoy that wonderful old Larry Norman anthem 'I Wished We'd All Been Ready' as the credits roll over rivers of blood and the screen fades to black.

Mel's choice of story and how it will be told (in Ancient Mayan dialect) almost certainly will produce something that is too complex and inaccessible for Joe Six-pack or Patty Pew-warmer to enjoy. I wonder if Mel was coming to grips with this fact and was having a big 'Oh Oh' moment the day before he drank, mambo-ed, cursed and race libelled much of his credibility away.

Disney is certainly wondering what they got themselves into, as Mel ponders how he can salvage something out of it.

In the meantime many of us ordinary schmoes will take a naughty pleasure in seeing mayhem among the Hollywood elites. Probably one of our over reaching preachers will say

"GAAWWDD hath said in His Holy Book,

The road of right living bypasses evil; watch your step and save your life. 18 First pride, then the crash, the bigger the ego, the harder the fall. 19 It's better to live humbly among the poor than to live it up among the rich and famous. Proverbs 16:16-18 (The Message)

'Neehya Neehya N Neehya Neehya', now join me in singing 'I've Got a Mansion Up in Glory'. "

I personally hope Mel will humbly and sincerely work and trust his way out of this and that Christians who are tempted to condemn him would begin to pray for him and for the messages God is trying to get out to the sinner, saint, soused, sobered, sanctimonious, salacious, supercilious, and simple in each of us.

Judgment Day (small letters) comes to one and all, that's why the red letters of the good book teaches,

'judge not lest ye be judged.' Matthew 7:1

and the black letters wisely tell us to;

'Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.' 1 Peter 4:8 (New International Version)

I confess I have a few misdemeanors needing covering, perhaps you do too, so let's be careful before we go picking through the rock pile of media reports looking for something to throw at the parties involved.

Note to Mel...

What ever you were thinking I am sure it was and will be interesting when we are let in on the mental processes.

Good luck to you and may God Bless.

LH

Mel Gibson's APOCALYPTO (or Forgive me, Forgive me, Forgive me.....or not; pt. 2)

Well one thing we can safely say is that Mel is no saint, but since he never claimed otherwise it seems abit unfair to crucify him for his foibles. His comments about Jews were truly disturbing and will need unpacking and addressing by Mel. I hope and fully expect he will continue to express remorse for the outrageous things he said. We will see if forgiveness is possible from those who have made an industry out of being offended.

Apparently the unbearble weightiness of being Mel is not a light affliction. Mel fully deserves to be held accountable for his failings but at the same time he should be supported through his journey towards healthier days, especially if he continues to take a humble place in this fiasco.

If Mel ever claimed he didn't need a saviour, or that he had transcended his humanity by embacing a magical faith, then we Christians would have more issues to deal with in the Mel file, but he hasn't proclaimed perfected holiness (as far as I know) and so I wish him well and eagerly wait to see the next exciting chapter in the ongoing saga of

MEL
Journey towards

FORGIVENESS

http://www.passionrecut.com/#


or

APOCALYPTO
http://apocalypto.movies.go.com/

or

some 'MUDDLED IN-BETWEEN STATE'
that we all seem to end up in for most of our sojourn here below.



Perhaps some community service time with my son Joshua (the saviour of his people and destroyer of worlds) could give Mel the outlet to compassion and violence he seems to crave. You see Josh hits, bites , pulls hair and destroys when he isn't being the most delightful 20 year old toddler you will ever meet.

Josh is the little guy peeking thru the
crowd to see if someone is there for him.


Hey Mel perhaps you've got a part for Josh in Mad Max IV?

LH