Over the years I've Been There, Done That. AKA The Turkey Hypothesis

Things I have said or done. Or would have, if the opportunity had been given to me;


1. In a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road.

The reason:
"Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!
I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."


2. My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.

3. I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her own life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

4. When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!"
His reply, "I know - I already got that side."

5. The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with a coworker of mine.
She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!"


I was told these are true stories. I believe most of them, because I've been there and done that a time or two.

Perhaps this explains my 'claw in beak' syndrome.

I was born on Christmas day on the Manitoulin Island. Those with the distinction of being form that fabled place are called 'Haweaters' and 'Freshwater Newfies'. I'm not sure who is supposed to be insulting whom by this comparison, if you know what I mean.

The year I was born my father had insisted he was having duck for the Christmas meal. Mom never cared much for duck. She had her heart set on a 'Little Turkey'. When she went into labour on Christmas Eve (a whole half century ago), she was delighted to know that the duck she was going to prepare for Christmas would have to wait. She was going to have Turkey for Christmas after all. I don't think she was in much shape to enjoy a full Christmas meal on the day I was born, but in one one way or the other, she had a 'Little Turkey' that Christmas.
(The stories above are are some proofs of the Turkey Hypothesis.)

Here's to trying to have a less Mortifying Christmas than some we have experienced.

Best Wishes
Len
aka the impossibleape

(I've evolved a little since my Turkey days.
Can you tell?)