When Theology Crashes with Reality

By Daniel Salinas
More than once theology has crashed with reality as we deal with our ongoing family challenges -- causing faith crises that can easily lead into mortal doubt. When this happens we have three options. First we can toss our theology and faith "out the window" because it does not make any sense; it is simply too painful. Many have followed this deceptive path of "throwing in the towel." Or we can leave our beliefs intact and keep on living, but, as if reality didn’t exist. This spiritual schizophrenia is all too common among believers. "Just rejoice in the Lord, brother, and everything will be all right." But the "less traveled road" is when we struggle to balance our theology with reality -- even when it takes time and tears.
My wife, Gayna, and I have gone through all the three options above at different stages, to different degrees during the last five and a half years. The idea of a loving God who always gives good things to his children has been hard to swallow at times. The constant painful shouts and severe disabilities of our daughter, Karis, have been too big a challenge. Broken dreams and shattered expectations. Daily disillusionment and constant frustrations. A deep sense of powerlessness and total incapacity. All of these things have wounded our faith and our souls in a way that only eternity will heal.

No pat answers

"Job’s friends" have been around us too. People with pat answers and a predictable god. And the pain grows. Rejection and cheap compassion have been by far the most common responses. And one more string of the rope, from which our faith hangs, tears off. The night comes and one more day of weeping is gone. Heaven is closer.
Karis has seen the best and the worst of us. We love her deeply but reject forcefully her condition. And sometimes our reactions have blurred the boundaries. Her total dependence takes away our precious independence. Her lack of words leaves us guessing about her needs and wants. Sometimes we get it wrong. Her twisting body leads us to see the future, trembling with fear.

God’s grace and prayer

Today we wonder how we have made it this far and how much longer we can continue. Is God’s grace the answer? What about the sincere prayers of many people? These are the two elements that have kept us from total despair. We thought we knew what grace meant, but we didn’t. God is way too big to figure out.
Karis is facing yet another surgery in the coming days. Her colon is deformed, enlarged and swollen. This probably accounts for many of her digestive problems. Nobody knows if the procedure will help her. It’s worth a try. But we keep our expectations low. We now know better.
Karis’s condition has moved lots of people to pray. Many of them have never seen her, but to them she is precious. We know that the spiritual support of those godly warriors is crucial. Often we tire of asking God to heal her or to do something to change her when nothing happens. But still -- others keep praying.
Habakkuk’s words sound idealistic and they challenge my faith every day:
"Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior."
Would this still be true, even if he gives us a wheelchair for life?


From the Latin Evangelist Oct-Dec 1999. http://www.lam.org/

God has a plan that is too mysterious to fathom. Faith is required.

Daniel's daughter Karis has died since this article was published. This too is reality.
May God Bless the Salinas' lives and ministries and the lives and ministries of all those who care for sick, wounded and disabled members of the human family.